Nigerian dancer Kaffy Shafau has opened up about the failure of her marriage, admitting that she lacked sufficient understanding of what marriage entails.
Speaking with Chude Jideonwo, Kaffy said many people enter into lifelong commitments without proper preparation or guidance. She called on society and parents to better educate individuals on the realities and responsibilities of marriage.
“I was not educated enough for marriage and a lot of us aren’t. Our parents are not preparing us enough. Living through their eyes is not enough education about marriage. It is a special course that needs to be taken,” Kaffy said.
The dancer also expressed concern about how easily marriage certificates are issued in comparison to, for instance, driver’s licenses. She argued that the process should involve mental health assessments and not just counseling, as many of the social issues faced in homes originate from unprepared couples.
Kaffy, who married Joseph Ameh in June 2012 and finalized her divorce in January 2022, emphasized that mental health tests should be mandatory for intending couples.
“It should be a mandatory requirement that drug tests, mental evaluations, couples therapy—all of these things—be completed. There should be a one-year program in human behavioral sciences before two people come together and potentially damage each other or a child they would bring into this world,” she stated.
Kaffy’s candid reflection underscores the importance of proper preparation, guidance, and mental readiness before marriage, highlighting a growing conversation on marriage education in Nigeria.
